Synopsis
Everything done in darkness,
will eventually be brought into the light.
I ran, but all it did was
keep me one step ahead of my past. I tried to start over; new name, new
identity. But you can't change your soul.
A fresh start at college was
just what I needed. For a while, it worked. I was the party girl, the one that
seemed confident, but it was a lie.
When guys kissed me--I felt
only pain.
When they touched me--Nothing
but fear.
Deep inside, every girl wants
to be the beauty in the story, to find someone that will see you as their
world.
But the truth? I was the
beast. And as much as I wanted redemption, I wasn't fool enough to think I'd
ever get it.
Until he walked into my life.
I wasn't prepared to fall for
someone. My scars were too deep, the wounds too raw. But he offered me peace,
he offered me security. I should have known it was just another lie--I should
have known that falling in love with my professor was a bad idea.
But I was powerless to stop
myself from falling.
And he was powerless to catch
me.
Because the darkness finally
caught up to me, and as fate would have it, a cruel twist almost bled me dry.
But I'm stronger than I knew. I'm stronger than you think.
You think you know my story,
but you don't....after all everyone has Shame in their lives-- and I'm no
longer afraid to show you mine.
Excerpt
“Just hold still!”
I yelled, holding up my phone while Gabe gave me the finger. I grimaced and
dropped the camera away from my face. “Nice, thanks for that.”
“I’m a giver.” He
smirked.
Saylor, his wife,
smacked him on the arm and rolled her eyes.
“Ouch.”
I scrunched up my
face when he leaned in and took Saylor’s mouth with his, kissing her senseless
in the local Starbucks like they were doing a romance scene in a movie. I
coughed.
They didn’t pull
apart.
So I took a
picture.
I earned another
finger, but Gabe still didn’t dislodge from his wife.
“Whoa!” Wes’s voice
sounded from behind me. “They been at it long?”
“Are all newlyweds
disgusting?” I voiced aloud.
Wes moved around
the table with his wife, Kiersten, and gave me a goofy shrug. I wanted to roll
my eyes, but Wes was too nice and hot. Let’s not forget the hot part. Both he
and Gabe were like walking poster boys for GQ. Both blond, now that Gabe had
decided to dye his hair back to his original color. It was like staring at two
really bright superstars.
Hating them was
like hating the Easter bunny. Try all you want, but you’ll eat every piece of
chocolate in the basket, just you wait.
“So, classes?”
Kiersten leaned forward. “I heard you got stuck with that hot new psych prof.”
Wes growled low in
his throat.
“Down boy.” I
braced my hands on the table and laughed. “Besides he’s not that hot.”
“A girl passed
out.” Kiersten’s eyebrows shot up. “Like in class.”
“Dehydration?” I
shrugged, taking a sip of coffee.
“Or…” She leaned
forward. “…the rumors are true.”
“Rumors…” Gabe
backed away from Saylor, his lips swollen. “…are always based on truth.”
“So you really did
do a naked dance in your underwear last week after getting drunk downtown at
Pike Place Market?” I tilted my head and waited while Gabe rolled his eyes and
popped his knuckles. “Exactly.”
He opened his
mouth.
I took a picture.
With a grimace, he
snatched my phone away from me. “Never thought I’d have to tell you to lay off
the pictures, Miss Paparazzi.”
I slumped in my
seat. “It’s for an assignment with that hot professor.”
“Aha!” Kiersten
jabbed her finger at me. “I knew it.”
I pinned her with a
look. “Sarcasm, friend, sarcasm.”
“Boys get girls
pregnant,” Gabe offered, while Wes choked on the coffee he’d just stolen out of
my hand.
Serves him right!
“Don’t date them.”
“You’re going to be
a great dad.” I smiled sweetly. “What? You’re just going to lock your girls in
their rooms and go—” I mimicked his voice. “—uh, you see boy parts are bad,
they make girls have lots of babies, like rabbits, and you know how rabbits
make dad nervous and—”
“Hilarious,” Gabe’s
eyes narrowed. “And please don’t talk about kids yet…”
Saylor laughed
quietly next to him then squeezed his arm.
My heart dropped.
A very long time
ago, I’d wanted to be that for Gabe, then Taylor happened and well… I
shuddered, blocking out the painful memories, the things I’d done, the things
he’d done, the things we’d done.
“You okay?” Wes
asked, his voice soft. He was way too perceptive for my taste. If I’d wanted to
share, he’d be the guy I’d talk to, but I was a vault. Sharing meant admitting
my guilt, and admitting meant I’d probably go insane just like he had.
“Yeah…” I
straightened in my seat. “…I just don’t want to fail my class, and I need to
write down nonverbal cues and take at least one picture. And pretty sure I need
to ace this first assignment on account that I was late to my prof’s class, and
I got in trouble.”
“He spank you?”
Gabe’s eyes mocked across his coffee.
“Yes, Gabe,” I said
calmly. “Because that’s how they punish bad students here at UW — with a
yardstick and a smile.”
“I wish.” He
whistled. “What I wouldn’t give to have Saylor—”
I plugged my ears.
He threw his head
back and laughed while Saylor turned bright red and put her hand over his mouth
to shush him.
“So…” Wes ignored
Gabe as was his usual and leaned across the table. “…why don’t you take
pictures of people here in the coffee shop? I mean, ask permission, but most
people here are super interesting, right? Studying? Stressed out? Tired?” He
pointed to a guy in the corner. “He looks like he’s running on five cups of
coffee and one hour of sleep. Go ask, take the picture, make some notes,
project done.”
“You make it sound
so easy,” I grumbled.
He grinned. “I’m
Wes Michels.”
I hung my head lower
and grimaced.
“Phone.” He held
out his hand and stood.
Within minutes, not
only had he snapped two pictures for me but had taken notes on two pre-med
students who had stayed up all night cramming for what they’d assumed would be
a pop quiz, only to find out that they’d been in the wrong class on the wrong
day.
“And that’s why I'm
not pre-med.” Gabe shuddered.
“Really?” Kiersten
asked. “I thought it was because big words scared you?”
“Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
What now?” He nodded. “Keep talking, Kiersten, or keep walking.”
“Spell it.” She
smirked.
“So this
professor…” Gabe changed the subject. “If he tries anything, use the Mace or
the rape whistle.”
“Right.” I nodded.
“I’ll be sure to do that. In class. With a hundred other students. When he
looks at me cross-eyed.”
“Good,” he huffed.
“I was kidding.”
Saylor patted
Gabe’s shoulder. “Gotta let the baby birds out of the nest someday, Gabe.”
Review
4.5 out of 5 stars
Shame is the 3rd book in the Ruin series and this time around it's all about Lisa. From the very beginning she has been with us as the roommate/best friend of Kiersten and the "cousin" of Gabe and to be honest I've always loved her character. She provided the perfect balance to the other character's lives. Being strong, supportive, sensitive, helping those she loves find happiness and in a sense providing some comic relief/sunshine to the craziness of everyone around her. From the outside it seemed as though her life was pretty normal, some could argue perfect, but of course that's just the surface, that's what she wants everyone to see, but Lisa's life is far from perfect and her confidence is a carefully constructed facade. Shame takes us beyond the surface, deep into not only her life, but also her insecurities and fear.
Shame has a different feel to it than the books about Wes and Gabe. Lisa's story had an element of suspense and mystery which added to the overall intensity of the book and in my opinion the result was pure perfection! I literally could not put this book down once I started.
Rachel Van Dyken expertly weaves Lisa's back story into the present day, slowly giving us pieces to the mystery surrounding Lisa's reasons for following Gabe to college. She's running, and she's been running and she's starting to wonder if she will ever be able to break free from her haunting demons and find her own HEA. She knows she has problems, she wants to fall in love, she wants to be with a guy without it making her sick, and just when she's found the first person she can literally stand to touch her, one she craves, not only is he off limits but little does she know he has all the power needed to absolutely crush her life.
Speaking of said boy, let's talk about Tristan. He was one of those characters I initially had a hard time figuring out. Was he going to be good, or would he go dark? Were his intentions pure? I loved watching him struggle with his body's reaction to Lisa vs. his desire to seek the truth and vengeance. When Lisa isn't at all like the person he imagined she would be it completely sends him spinning, and when this happens is when we finally see his own walls crumbling and we are left with this sensitive, strong, caring man, who has finally truly become himself all because he fell in love with the right person. It's funny because while not being truthful about who he is while with Lisa it actually gives him the freedom to be his true self! But will his love for Lisa be enough to to help pull her out of the darkness?
This book is hands down a must read. Even if you haven't read any of the other books in this series, I believe you can still read this one and enjoy it as much as die hard fans of the series, such as myself! As always Rachel Van Dyken has given us this beautiful piece of artwork with beauty, pain, love and the added elements mystery and suspense which will keep you on the edge of your seats until you get to the end!
About Author Rachel Van Dyken
Rachel Van Dyken is the New York Times, Wall Street
Journal, and USA Today Bestselling author of regency and contemporary romances.
When she's not writing you can find her drinking coffee at Starbucks and
plotting her next book while watching The Bachelor.
She keeps her home in Idaho with her Husband and their snoring Boxer, Sir
Winston Churchill. She loves to hear from readers! You can follow her writing
journey at www.rachelvandykenauthor.com
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